This
very strange comic appeared in the May/June 1963 edition of American
Modeler. Although it's purpose purports to be a humorous way to let
off steam about some aspect of modeling, it comes across to me as uncharacteristically
nasty, and not real funny to boot. It uses sort of a free verse (non
rhyming) prose. What do you think?
Mad Modeler's Coloring Book
Lyrics by Palmer & SchwarzchildAnimation by Bob Lopshire
No matter what your branch of modeling may be, no matter what
you may be mad about at the moment, we guarantee these delightful portraits
will cheer you up - unless you see yourself there!
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Look at the man with bags of money.
He donates trophies. He likes model airplanes. He
likes model airplane flyers. He likes model airplane contests.
He likes to give away trophies. Color him sick. |
See the funny man? He is a club leader
member. Some call him "Club Leader." Some call him other
things. He always knows best. Never makes mistakes.
He's got a good line. Color him pure. |
Look at the microfilm modeler. Isn't
he thin? He isn't allowed to run. He can't even sneeze.
He's very delicate. Talking helps his models fly.
Sketch in lots of hot air. |
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This is a contest director. He has
an impossible job. He works for the AMA. Color him red,
white and blue. He is very important. He has lots of
people working. They would do anything for him. Color
their knives red. |
See the unhappy Rat Racer? See the
tangled lines? Hear the nasty words? Color the air black.
He changes a prop at each stop. He lands on the wrong
side of the circle. Let's blame the pit crew. |
What is a hand-launch glider nut?
He's a looong arm. He has a head and legs too. But his
arm is loooooong. Watch him throw his glider. Listen
to him throw it. Color him determined. |
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See the nice airplane? It is radio
controlled. Sometimes it flys right. Sometimes it flys
wrong. It has lots of little parts. Sometimes it flies
straight down. Sometimes it doesn't fly at all. Color
it frustrating. |
This is a towline glider flyer. He
runs many miles. Color his face green. See his long
nose. He smells for thermals. Yes, he smells:
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Look at the greedy hobby dealer.
He is a good friend. He likes to make money. So color
him green. Most times he is out of stock. His distributor
gets the blame. He's good at passing the buck. But not
the one he earns. |
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See the man with glasses? Aren't
they thick? He looks for model airplanes. He's a timer.
See the angry man? He's a contestant. The timer
is watching the wrong model. Color the contestant very purple. |
See the spinning speed demon? He
goes round and round. Like a top. Color him blur.
He eats a lot. He never has to run across a field.
He's not fat. Just thick. |
See this happy fellow. Those are
not flippers. Those are his feet. They grew that way.
Color the water blue. He has water on the brain.
Color him soggy. |
Posted September 20, 2012
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